Will Rogers 1879-1935

“You can't say that civilization don't advance...in every war they kill you in a new way.”

“I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.”

“Common sense is not common.”

“It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so.”

“You know everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.”

“Politics has got so expensive that it takes lots of money to even get beat with.”

“This would be a great time in the world for some man to come along that knew something.”

“We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.”

“There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. -- I just watch the government and report the facts.”

“If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.”

“I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him ‘father.’”

“Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.”

“Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.”

“You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.”

“Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.”

“Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.”

“Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.”

“Things ain't what they used to be and never were.”

“A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.”

“When ignorance gets started it knows no bounds.”

“An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.”

“Liberty doesn't work as well in practice as it does in speeches.”

“I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.”

“Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.”

“If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.”

“Never miss a good chanch to shut up.”